


in death there is hope

by madamerenard



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: M/M, confessing their love because theyre stupid and gay, two bros chillin in the lifestream
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:34:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25862902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/madamerenard/pseuds/madamerenard
Summary: Elidibus’ tone is flat. “Your timing is dreadful.”“You turning into a god threw a bit of a wrench in things,” Emet-Selch argues.(post 5.3.)
Relationships: Elidibus/Solus zos Galvus | Emet-Selch
Comments: 4
Kudos: 49





	in death there is hope

Emet-Selch meets a child in the Lifestream. A very familiar child with white robes and a red mask, and he’s sniffling and swallowing sobs. Emet-Selch takes the child’s hand and brings him to a quiet place, away from the constantly murmuring souls who are undoubtedly overwhelming the newly dead.

Laying them both down in the aetherflow, Emet-Selch waits patiently. There is nothing he has more of than time, and this can’t be rushed. No matter how badly he wants it.

Eventually, the Elidibus he knows returns to him. Even as an adult, though, he was always so small.

“There you are,” Emet-Selch says brightly. His hand has not stopped clutching the other’s. Elidibus is silent and still as ever, but Emet-Selch can feel the turmoil stifled in his aether. Poorly stifled, he thinks, although if Emet-Selch were anyone else, they would not notice. It seems no one else ever did.

“Oh, stop your fretting. I came here with a glowing hole in my chest. Bit dramatic, I admit, but you know me. Drama finds me.”

Elidibus, again, says nothing. He is tight and tensed, trying desperately to drown some sort of emotion. Or many emotions, that is, swirling and churning his aether. Emet-Selch sighs, wishing not for the first time that the Emissary allowed himself to feel something - anything. It would only ever boil back up and burn him...

He squeezes Elidibus’ hand. Gently, but firmly, bringing him back to the present. He hopes his eyes, exposed as they are, convey the message he can’t put into words:  _ you’re safe here. _

Elidibus looks at their hands. Then he looks at the other, as if seeing him for the first time.

“I failed,” is the first thing Elidibus says. Emet-Selch sighs in disappointment, but he can’t say it was unexpected. He was hoping for something more romantic, though. 

The next thing Elidibus says, with some scorn, is _“You.”_ Emet-Selch expected that too, seeing the memory bubble up in Elidibus’ mind. He can only spare a sheepish grin.

In the Lifestream, he is so much closer to Elidibus than in life or whatever state they were in as Ascians. In the Lifestream, Elidibus cannot hide as well. In the Lifestream, Emet-Selch finally knows.  He feels betrayal close its pincers around Elidibus’ aether. Shame follows, crawling over him and seeking a way in. And deep inside, he feels envy, burning a hole in his soul. 

“Sorry,” he says lamely, not really very sorry at all.

“You aided them,” Elidibus accuses.

“I did.”

_“Why?”_ Elidibus’ anger seeps through his voice.

Emet-Selch frowns thoughtfully. He shifts, leaning in closer to rest his head against the Emissary’s. A very bold and intimate showing for mortals, but in Amaurotine terms he is simply sitting beside him, their aether only touching. Still, Emet-Selch has spent a lot of time among mortals, so he silently admits that this is selfish of him. Elidibus doesn’t understand this kind of intimacy, but he does.

“The grief was tearing you apart. I couldn’t bear to see you suffer so.”

He can feel Elidibus’ aether run hot with rage. “You ruined everything.”

“I only helped them to do what you wanted.”

“Which was _what,_ exactly?”

Emet-Selch gives him a look. “You, the diabolical puppeteer, initiating a brute force onslaught against the Warrior of Light and their friends? You _wanted_ to die.”

He feels Elidibus’ aether flinch. Something snaps, something breaks. The tension floods out, and he unravels. “No, I didn’t want to die. But I had anticipated that something might...happen.”

“Then what was all of that about?”

“Revenge.”

The fact that Elidibus only sought this after Emet-Selch perished means something to him. Even if it wasn’t true, even if he was only dreaming. He could pretend.

He pushes his aether closer. They’re touching, but it’s not enough. He wants to wrap himself around Elidibus and squeeze. He wants to dig his claws in and never let go. He wants Elidibus to do the same. They are both monsters, after all.

Elidibus shoots a look at him. A warning glare, as if Emet-Selch is a predator and Elidibus won’t allow himself to be preyed so easily. A challenge? The Architect brushes against him more firmly, and Elidibus retreats.

“Don’t,” that husky voice is low and rough, and somehow Emet-Selch can imagine those violet eyes staring a new hole through him as their faces turn towards each other. “Don’t. Not now. Even you wouldn’t be so cruel.”

“Cruel?” Emet-Selch repeats dully. Elidibus grasps him by the neck, hands shaking as his claws dig into spiritual flesh.

“Never once have you looked my way. Not in Amaurot. Not as Zodiark, not as Ascians-” He takes a shuddering breath, calming himself and steadying his voice. “And now, bereft of all else, you would come to me? Am I now somewhat suitable because you are  _ bored _ _?”_ The claws dig in deeper, but Elidibus won’t get the pleasure of drawing blood. Not as they are. Still, he wants to try. His aether floods with frustration, with over ten thousand years of tightly concealed emotions.

Emet-Selch only scoffs. “I am not ‘bereft of all else’. The others are here. Hythlodaeus. Lahabrea, even. But I know how much you value your peace and quiet.”

“Then why? Why are you…” Elidibus’ teeth grind together. “Why are you doing this?”

Emet-Selch raises a brow. “Must I spell it out for you?”

Elidibus closes his eyes, head thumping as he flops firmly back. “Cryptic and vague. Why did I expect anything more?”

“Why indeed?” Emet-Selch replies cheerily. “Come, Elidibus, it’s truly not so hard if you use your mind.”

Elidibus’ tone is flat. “Your timing is dreadful.”

“You turning into a god threw a bit of a wrench in things,” Emet-Selch argues.

“I thought it would make you happy,” Elidibus murmurs. “Saved the star and all. In the end, it wasn’t enough.”

“That wasn’t your fault,” Emet-Selch tells him, oddly serious.

Elidibus looks over. “What will happen to Him now?”

Emet-Selch shrugs, throwing a hand to the side. “Who cares? It’s Azem’s mess now. We’re here. Together. And I don’t know about you, but I’ve felt remarkably lighter since dying. Can’t we simply enjoy the afterlife?”

Elidibus hums. “I don’t see why not.”

**Author's Note:**

> ffxiv: actually elidibus was a child  
> me: i recognize that canon has made a decision, but given that it's a stupid-ass decision, i've elected to ignore it


End file.
